Thursday, January 22, 2009

Jebus

it's like Megan's New Year's resolution was to make certain every post she writes is monstrously stupid. There's too much fresh dumb to even have time to go back over recent stupidity we've missed here. One thing is clear; Megan has decided to speak only in conserva-code. By "playing" dumb or coy she enables her readers to feel proud of spouting conservative delusions in the comments to educate her, and it's just a coincidence her ignorance plays directly into conservative talking points. She's not being ideological, she's just trying to make sense of this crazy world we all live in. That she tends to drift into authoritarian, trust the strong republican daddy, thinking is just a coincidence.
And congrats, Megan, on living in DC but not going to the inauguration. You've so internalized the snooty NYC "I'm better than a tourist, I'm LOCAL" mindset you made yourself miss history in the making. Nevermind that you're no longer local, having moved across the river, but now are one of those commuters you used to hate. Soon you'll be bitching about bike lanes and how you can't drive your Mini in them.
Anyhow, here's a few shorters.

In a political vacuum, no one can hear you scream:

Caroline Kennedy withdraws her name from consideration for Hillary's senate seat, presumably because Paterson wasn't going to give it to her. This is the reason she wasn't qualified in the first place. Kennedy was given much and did . . . not alot[sic].
As... "someone" pointed out in the comments, "alot" is not a word. Irony, however, is a word, and Megan questioning anyone's qualifications for anything, ever, is a good example of it. I'm glad Kennedy won't be my Senator (y'know), but she has done a great deal more in her life than Megan.

Do's and don'ts:

Megan linked to Breibart's Big Hollywood start-up. And not to mock it. I'd be angry if weren't such a ridiculously stupid thing to do. At least she's becoming increasingly honest that's she's simply a conservative, not a libertarian. Authoritarianism and libertarianism are mutually exclusive, except in her confused mind.

Grad days:

Has Megan mentioned lately how little awareness she has of the privileges she's been granted in life?

Partisanship, explained:

It only counts when the other side is doing it. It's like in sports, where a dirty player who cheats by bending the rules is gritty if he's on your team.
Also, don't forget to project.
"I'm happy that McCain is not president. But I'm unhappy that the people who booed Bush are happy. It's not enough to win. They have to gloat. Some of their happiness is just that conservatives, their enemies, are unhappy. So part of me can't resist wanting to return the favor."
(Megan is pretending someone said this to her. It's probably not true.)
You see, it's the left that bases their entire political identity on what they think their opposition doesn't like, so therefore they cannot be happy without oppressing conservatives by not agreeing with them. So the right is totally justified in eliminationist fantasies. In fact, this all has retroactively justified the 2x4 crack.
How dare we enjoy seeing the worst President in American history leave?

Public service announcement:

Ummmm, is it a public service to incoherently try to hype an inconsequential change in format without actually mentioning the change?

TurboTax denies responsibility for Geithner's mistakes:
Perhaps Obama's first act as president should be to introduce the reflexive into English in order to help business handle the increasing number of such delicate situations. One of the great charms of a language like Spanish is that no one ever screws anything up. Problems can be dismissed with an airy "se rompiĆ³"--it broke itself. The equivalent constructions in English, such as "mistakes were made", lack the elegant ubiquity.
I think she meant this sarcastically, but I bet even she's not sure.
And, obviously, this is another reason to switch to a Forbes-style flat tax. It's all about efficiency, not the wealthy getting yet another massive tax break.

It's so . . . stimulating:
Golf courses seem like a quite good way to get money out the door quickly; clearing land is relatively low-skilled work compared to high-speed rail projects. That means it can soak up any available labor you happen to have lying around, while specialized projects require specialized workers who aren't necessarily the same people thrown out of work by a collapse in the market for mortgage-backed securities.
I.... think I blacked out for a minute there, but yes, Megan is suggesting we build more golf courses to help fix the economy. I don't know how to snark that, or whether it's even necessary to.

This is getting long, so I'll come back later to look at the rest of today's stupidity. I'm sure you've seen Greenwald's wonderful smack down of Megan by now, but if not, there's the link.

8 comments:

M. Bouffant said...

Golf courses.

Sweet Blood of Jesus, golf courses.

Andrew Johnston said...

I know. The first thing I thought about when McArdle said we could fix unemployment with golf courses was this.

Maybe she was kidding, but it's so hard to tell with Megan, isn't it?

Anonymous said...

Golf courses? By this point Megan is really just a few steps and a jump away from endorsing that people unemployed for "too long" should just be enslaved by the government and sold to rich people.

M. Bouffant said...

And you'd think that, besides golf courses not being really, um, economically useful, she'd be aware what an eco-disaster they are.

Susan of Texas said...

I don't think she even read the stimulus plan.

Anonymous said...

You know what? Megan is right. We are misunderstanding her point. After that golf course post, I have finally seen the light. Her blog is supposed to be Jonathan Swift-style satire. It still sucks and everything, but at least now I can tolerate it knowing that the entire thing is meant as a bad joke.

Parmenides said...

I don't think it is possible for me to even understand how a writer like her, makes me want to severely damage my head by bashing it over and over into a brick wall. She's the only one. Most, like doughpants, I can laugh at. Her, she makes me want to hurt myself for theoretically being the same species.

Dr Zen said...

Her education cost more than 100K? Fuck, you don't get value for money in the States, eh? Unless you consider that she's paid for a life of ease, not for actually becoming educated.