Maybe a Little Too Efficient?

I've never really understood why anyone would put their faith in the free market. To me, it's just like faith in god, only it makes less sense. At least god is a single actor working towards his own means. Decisions are being made in some kind of coherent fashion (even if it might look like nonsense to us mere mortals.)

Free market fuckers, on the other hand, essentially believe that a shitload of uncorrelated decisions made for a myriad of reasons by a bunch of people (many of whom are too stupid to pass college level calculus classes) somehow amalgamate together to form really good ideas! Yeah, 'cause people are so notoriously good at making decisions and their collective actions have never in the history of the galaxy created unintended shitstorms. It's like they think adding enough negative numbers together will somehow result in a positive number.

Example: let's take a look at the Dow Jones Industrial Average's gyrations du jour:


Who the fuck can look at those numbers and decide that the market is "rational?!?!?" It's swung hundreds of points, in both directions, IN A SINGLE FUCKING DAY!! What possible meaningful absorption and analysis of information could be going-the-fuck-on? How is that anything other than just noise? Efficient market my ass. IT'S A FUCKING RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR.

Wait a second... I'm looking at it more closely now.. and... wait is that... OMFG GOD! THAT'S JESUS'S IMAGE IN THOSE SQUIGGLES! PRAISE THE LORD! HALLELUJAH! IT'S A MIRACLE! Surely god is watching over all of us! If only those traders would see the light, then the Dow would climb so high that the lord himself could touch it! Let Jesus into your risk analysis and be saved! AMEN!!!

Fucking idiots.

On a side note, I just read that religious people's brains are deficient in figuring out their own errors (or taking responsibility for them). Viewing free-market leg-humping as the religious fervor that it truly is, those results certainly explain McArdle, don't they? It explains a couple of religious ex-girlfriends of mine, too! Oh shit, my bitter is showing.

Ross Douthat: Still an Asshat

I think I may have used a similar title before, but what the hey, asshat and Douthat go together like "holy shit" and "what a fucking moron."

That is to say, Ross, -having failed completely to reinvent the GOP via his book-, has decided to go whole hog back to the regular old GOP in order to make up for lost time. In this lovely gem, he's defending right-wing hypocrisy about the Jamie Lynn Spears pregnancy vs. the Bristol Palin pregnancy.

James Dobson didn't call Bristol Palin's pregnancy "a great and wonderful thing."

Then Ross quotes Dobson:

"In the 32-year history of Focus on the Family, we have offered prayer, counseling and resource assistance to tens of thousands of parents and children in the same situation the Palins are now facing. We have always encouraged the parents to love and support their children and always advised the girls to see their pregnancies through, even though there will of course be challenges along the way. That is what the Palins are doing, and they should be commended once again for not just talking about their pro-life and pro-family values, but living them out even in the midst of trying circumstances.

"Being a Christian does not mean you're perfect. Nor does it mean your children are perfect. But it does mean there is forgiveness and restoration when we confess our imperfections to the Lord. I've been the beneficiary of that forgiveness and restoration in my own life countless times, as I'm sure the Palins have.

and approvingly muses:

Challenges along the way ... trying circumstances ... confess our imperfections ... Sounds like he's saying teen pregnancy is a bad thing,

My god, Ross, you're right, it does sound like he's totally white-washing the Palin thing unquestionably denouncing teen pregnancy!

Magnanimously, Ross does concede that Rush Limbaugh was being hypocritical, and in an update adds Bill O'Reilly and Lisa Schiffren to the list, but he's not convinced. After all "calling Rush a prominent religious conservative is a little bit of a stretch." No, Ross, a stretch is what happens to yours and Rush's pants every morning when you put them on. On the other hand, calling the most popular right-wing voices who incessantly spout on about their Christianity, "prominent religious conservative[s]" fits like a FUCKING GLOVE.

He also notes that some guy named Bill Maier said positive things about Jamie Lynn, which convinced me cause whenever someone says "prominient religious right winger" I'm all like "Oh, are they talking about Bill Maier AGAIN?!?!" Another notable supporter of Ms. Spears is the omnipresent Jonathon Last, who has millions of viewers/listeners just like Rush and O'Reilly, apparently.

And, point proven, Ross the Boss blithely ends his post with:

So, to recap: Teen pregnancy, bad; carrying the child to term, good; Spears-Palin hypocrisy, not so much.

Which leads me to my well reasoned and though provoking rejoinder of a recap.

Ross Douth is a fucking asshat. Holy shit, what a fucking moron.

Attempt or Contempt? You Decide

Thus types McArdle:

Liberals wonder why they are parodied as out-of-touch secularists who mix near-total ignorance of traditional Christianity with a seething, idiotic attempt.

"Attempt" at what, exactly, Megan? Common sense & rationality? Who is more "out-of-touch" than those who take as literal truth the myths & legends of thousands of yrs. ago? Is "traditional" Xianity composed of the fundamentalist wackjobs to whom Douthat referred (in the link McM provided) as "minor-league kooks, obscure bloggers and chain-email peddlers?" And for all those trad Xians, if they don't swallow the holy book whole (Book of Revelation & all) why do they believe any of it?

Great Gobs of Goo, don't Ross & Megan realize how stupid most people are? What's the polled percentage who still believe that Sen. Obama is a Moooslim? Do they think that all the "traditional" Xians are rejecting the possibility of Barack The Anti-Christ out of hand?

Alternate (Sensible) Universe version:

God-Squadders wonder why they are parodied as ignorant backwoods doofuses who mix abysmal ignorance of reality & truth with seething idiotic contempt for those wiser than they.

The post drew 201 comments, which may indicate something. Like how nutty Xians are.