Compare & Contrast For Consistency, Or: Trying To Stir Up Some Shit Here

Conor Friedersdorf on his constructive InstaPundit criticism:

I am a writer. When I critique people or sites, it isn’t because I’ve got a personal grudge against them, or because I want them to fail, or because I want to divide and conquer them, whatever that means — it is because I think they are wrong on some matter of substance.

The very same Mr. Friedersdorf on something closer to my heart:

Perhaps that was just Mr. Friedersdorf on his own time, not something that he typed as "a writer." In which case he should use a different name, or add a clever disclaimer to his profile like: "Not the 'serious' me, expect no consistency w/ my claims of substance."

Biting the Hand that Pats You

Short Megan McArdle:

Holy shit, my commentors are such knee jerk conservative sycophants that even I can't take it anymore. Fucking morons with the temerity to disagree with me.

I'm not sure which is more hilarious; that Megan took this long to realize that The Big Fat Idiot is openly racist, or that her following thinks that Limbaugh would actually go after a conservative trope, let alone be sophisticated enough to do so with satire.

Update: New words, all hers:

And yes, I think that the people who are claiming that Rush is inciting a race war or a revolution are also humorless twits.

Huh-Ha! The imaginary liberal response is just as bad as the actual Limbaugh thing that happened! It's a tie!

Update II: I don't know how I missed the genius that is Megan saying "I could not possibly like Rush Limbaugh less" one second and then claiming that accusing him of "inciting a race war" is beyond the pale the next, but there you have it. Once again she is stupid on so many levels that no mere mortal can keep track of them all.

Annals Of Hate Mail

Mark Ames of The Exiled fields a few missives from Friends of Megan, & links to a horridly personal & insulting (I entirely approve, of course.) piece he wrote about Megan's ancestry.

Guilt By Association

By way of THE EXILED, a photo of Megan close to kissy-kissy w/ the typist of this, which has already been well handled (facts, research, blah blah) by Sadly, No!'s Tintin & noted (Facts, research, well ... no.) by others.The moment she's gotten Jonah Goldberg to recant "Liberal Fascism" she may want to call her acquaintance Vadum & ask him to cool it w/ the "In other words, nihilistic liberals are planning to drain 9/11 of all meaning," & "the administration's plan to flush 9/11 down the memory hole just as it has tried to do by rechristening the Global War on Terror the "Overseas Contingency Operations."

Because if that's not the moral equivalent of slinging "fascist" around, what is?

And a tip of the Bouffant chapeau to Euripides, who linked THE EXILED to our attention, while commenting @ S,N!

Cheap Shot At Non-Contrarianism

Shorter:

Why Marriage?

I am not being contrarian by needing a note from the gov't. telling me w/ whom I may sleep. Also, Mr. McSudelman (of the spotty employment history) has figured that if I haven't been fired by now I never will be, so I'm kind of a cash cow. Mooo.

Cottage Cheese

Not that I've been adding anything here recently, & there's no such thing as bad publicity (especially w/ a link) but

There’s an entire cottage industry dedicated to picking apart her posts and they do a pretty good job.

let's name some names here, people! Not merely FMM, but fellow cottage snark industrialist Susan of Texas.

At least this guy was kind enough to link.

Ted, here is a blog that chronicles McMegan’s insipidness.

Do read both the linked threads. Then no one here will have to waste time or keystrokes on the inspirational Megan posts.

Oh, we see it's been done. Have to do some catching up around here.

Let's Not Get Crazy Here, People!

Yeah! She's talking up affirmative action!

But hey, we all get things we don't deserve. I'll go further: almost all of us get something we don't deserve as a result of our race, including white people. Perhaps even especially white people.

Yes, perhaps. It might be that white people are overwhelmingly represented disproportionately in the ranks of the privileged. Or, maybe black people are just stoopid, too. I dunno. Too hard to tell, really.

If you don't believe it, ask yourself why repeated studies show that resumes with identifiably black names get fewer interview offers than identical white resumes.

Which is why she modifies her statements about racism? Wait, when she says "if you don't believe it" is she implying that she's trying to convince someone that racism exists? Perhaps not.

Sonia Sotomayor is not manifestly unqualified to be a Supreme Court justice, so focusing on affirmative action is completely irrelevant.

But the fact that your cohorts are doing it is only maybe, kind of, and indication that they're racist, short-sighted dicks. Perhaps.

You can argue with her politics or her legal judgement, and hey, I'm all ears.

Liar.

But the affirmative action complaints aren't advancing our quest to find out whether or not she'd be a good justice. They're just alienating the people you want to convince.

Megan, consistent with her uncanny ability to be about one or two years behind the conventional wisdom of even the most stubborn moron, is just now realizing that Republicans have gone insane. Perhaps.

Maybe a Little Too Efficient?

I've never really understood why anyone would put their faith in the free market. To me, it's just like faith in god, only it makes less sense. At least god is a single actor working towards his own means. Decisions are being made in some kind of coherent fashion (even if it might look like nonsense to us mere mortals.)

Free market fuckers, on the other hand, essentially believe that a shitload of uncorrelated decisions made for a myriad of reasons by a bunch of people (many of whom are too stupid to pass college level calculus classes) somehow amalgamate together to form really good ideas! Yeah, 'cause people are so notoriously good at making decisions and their collective actions have never in the history of the galaxy created unintended shitstorms. It's like they think adding enough negative numbers together will somehow result in a positive number.

Example: let's take a look at the Dow Jones Industrial Average's gyrations du jour:


Who the fuck can look at those numbers and decide that the market is "rational?!?!?" It's swung hundreds of points, in both directions, IN A SINGLE FUCKING DAY!! What possible meaningful absorption and analysis of information could be going-the-fuck-on? How is that anything other than just noise? Efficient market my ass. IT'S A FUCKING RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR.

Wait a second... I'm looking at it more closely now.. and... wait is that... OMFG GOD! THAT'S JESUS'S IMAGE IN THOSE SQUIGGLES! PRAISE THE LORD! HALLELUJAH! IT'S A MIRACLE! Surely god is watching over all of us! If only those traders would see the light, then the Dow would climb so high that the lord himself could touch it! Let Jesus into your risk analysis and be saved! AMEN!!!

Fucking idiots.

On a side note, I just read that religious people's brains are deficient in figuring out their own errors (or taking responsibility for them). Viewing free-market leg-humping as the religious fervor that it truly is, those results certainly explain McArdle, don't they? It explains a couple of religious ex-girlfriends of mine, too! Oh shit, my bitter is showing.

America Drinks & Goes Home

Why does Glenn Reynolds (echoed by Megan, from whom the quote below) think that Americans are this fucking shallow?

It strikes me that this might be a golden opportunity for the Republicans, though.  The news post-election was filled with commentators pointing out that the first few times a person votes tend to seal their political identity.  Well, a president coming out strongly against the drinking age could put the next generation in Republican pockets for decades.

Oh, because 'Murkins are that shallow. I keep forgetting. (Wouldn't George Bush have been the ideal prez to have done this? Another golden opportunity squandered.)

"Our 'base?' Why, alcoholic grad students, & under-grads headed for the bar. Room, not exam."

These are principled, core values? As the right thrashes about trying to keep its political head above the "bitter swill of civil war and segregation" it's about to drown in, the gimmicks & obfuscations they will attempt to disguise the fact that George W(orst) Bush was completely & absolutely one of them, & that their not half- but un-baked, salmonella-ridden economic "theories" have crashed & burned w/ the financial system are surely going to be amusing, but something this pathetic, this soon? It is to laugh.

We should add that the WSJ piece ("Hopes for the Obama Presidency") includes contributions from Nation editor Katrina vanden Heuvel, Shelby Steele ("Black America Could Have Done Better") & Gov. Sarah Palin, who, in her usual brilliant way, titles her item "Tax Cuts and Fiscal Discipline," goes on for half of it about Alaska's willingness to drill & sell to the lower 48, & a quarter of it about "Mr. Obama and Congress must continue to guarantee a strong national defense by modernizing and equipping our armed forces; by treating active-duty military and veterans fairly; and by supporting the families of our service members." How much "fiscal discipline" do you think the gov. would like exercised over the defense budget?

Sarah Palin offers a more serious (or larger, at least) vision than Ole Perfess'r Reynolds. There's a condemnation.

Still Not Getting It

La McArdle speaks:

Palindrones

Why is Sarah Palin lying about having gone off teleprompter? People I trust have spoken to people who were there, and if she went off teleprompter, she somehow nonetheless managed to deliver exactly the remarks that she handed out to the press beforehand.

What I don't get about this lie is the pointlessness. I expect politicians to lie. But I expect them to tell the standard sort of lies about how they will give us all $5 solar cars by 2010, and never, ever sleep with their staff. This seems like some sort of bizarre compulsive disorder.

It puts me in mind of a famous quote by a UN chief: "You Americans never make simple stupid moves. Only complicated stupid moves that make the rest of us think we might be missing something."

What am I missing?

Well, you're missing that the UN chief (If it's such a g-o-double-dee-a-m-n famous quote, which UN chief was it?) is saying that you Americans are stupid, whether your stupid moves appear complicated or not.

And that Gov. Palin may, like the Moooslims, consider it "OK" to lie in furtherance of a theocratic goal. Or, Mme. Moosedroppings may be disordered.

Let's contemplate this again:

People I trust have spoken to people who were there

That's why they call it journalism, isn't it? I can only hope that those Megan trusted trusted those who were there, & that those who were there were trustworthy.


P. S.: If you think I'm going to read one word of Megan's about the current financial climate, when John McCain has assured us that the fundamentals of "our" economy are sound, think again!

The irony of Ross D. calling something else dull..

Ross D writes: "as a political figure, [Biden's] one of the least interesting veep picks in recent memory." What a complement to Gore & Quayle!

He continues:

"[Biden] doesn't offer Obama a chance to expand the map - his native state is small, blue and boring, and he hasn't generated any political excitement outside Delaware in twenty years."

For one, Ross is wrong. Ross is also completely ignorant of the politics of Southeastern Pennysylvania and South Jersey. For once, I hope that Chris Matthews can set him straight. Biden is a big deal in these areas. South Jersey simply isn't represented in the Senate--there is more attachment and affection for Joe Biden in South Jersey than there is for any other Senator. The same goes for Pennsylvania--little connection exists[ed] between Spector and Santorum and the denizens of Philadelphia. Biden's their guy.

Ross continues: "[Biden won't] co-opt an up-for-grabs constituency (the notion that he's going to be the candidate of Joe Lunchbucket seems mildly implausible, working-class roots or no)." Well, Biden is the poorest Senator, and John McCain needs his toes to count his houses. So, yes, there will be an attraction for the poorer folk to Biden than, say, Mitt Romney.

Just wait until the debates, Ross.

Even When She's Right, She's Wrong

First, we get hit with disturbing sexual inneundo in her post title "No, really, I'll pull out." I haven't been this permaflaccid since Bob Dole was pimping for Viagra. Seriously, I think my dick just shrank all the way up inside my body cavity.

Megan spends the post explaining that she thinks the possibility of a timetable for withdrawal being set while Bush is still in office is better for McCain than it is for Obama:

I'm puzzled by war opponents who think that voters will suddenly love Obama for having been "right all along". Assuming arguendo that this is true, the psychological logic is off. Most Americans supported the war. Do you become more endeared of your spouse when it turns out that you really should have taken that left fork thirty miles ago? Most people prefer folie à deux.

Unfortunately, she may be right about this. Of course, that doesn't make her any less incompetent.

Rather than feeding the early war proponents the same self-centered bullshit they've been filling up on ever since it became clear how stratospherically wrong they were, she could've pointed out that this isn't the best way to make a decision. How about actually conceding that Barack may have gotten it right because he has better-than-average judgment? Naw, after all, who wants the leader of the free world to be smarter than Dick, John, and Jane? Maybe she might point out that McCain was one of the earliest proponents of the war and his voice, filled with warmongering and lies, was one of the reasons so many Americans were fooled? McCain wanted us to invade Iraq BEFORE Bush started pushing for it, for fuck's sake. Why not point out that, while a lot of us were wrong along with him, he was the first to be wrong. His wrongness was a deciding factor in the wrongness of all those who trusted him to be right!

But, naw, that's too "complex" and the rubes won't get it. Stick to the cynical observations, Megan. It's not like you have a unique position of being a somewhat well listened to voice that might actually sway a few people to realize the folly of voting for the guy who was just as dumb as they were. Just go ahead and encourage them to vote for the guy that steered them wrong in the first place. Carry on, Megs. You're doing God's work.

No, Megan. we apprecitate it.

Apologies:

. . . for the light posting, by the way--I have some sort of hideous lung infection, and a 10:20 doctor's appointment stretched to nearly one. Insert rant on doctor's office scheduling tactics here. Insert second rant about hideous plague-flu that I acquired from a blogger who shall remain nameless.

OMG! This is my favorite McIdiot post ever. First, she gets all narcissistic and apologizes for not spouting out of her ass enough lately. Yes, Megan, thanks for the apology. Our lives were so hollow in the short time that you left them.

Then, she gets all melodramatic about a fucking chest cold. Wahhh! Hideous lung infection, wahh! Do you have bronchitis? Do you have pneumonia? No? Then shut the fuck up and take some Tylenol like the rest of us.

Wahhhhh, she had to wait to be treated for her completely benign illness. POOR MEGAN! Of course, it's all the doctors fault. I guess she would know, because she spent 5 years working at a doctor's office. Oh wait, no, that was me. Hate to burst your bubble, little-Mrs-Perfect, but doctor's usually only run hours late because they get caught up in emergencies. You know what those are, don't you? They're medical problems exactly the opposite of your FUCKING FLU! Fun fact: doctor's offices would be a lot less crowded if Americans didn't rush to get "fixed" when they have the god damn sniffles.

Finally, she wraps it up with some kind of innuendo or name drop or something. I guess we're supposed to be all impressed cause she hangs out with "bloggers" and gets close enough to actually touch their germs! OHHH, SO DREAMY! I wonder who it was? Was it Matt, who she finally gave that long awaited kiss for on his way out the door, or was it that uppity new guy who brought the germs in from his last office? I hope it's the latter so that we can find out if mademoiselle will "ever go back!!!!!"

In summary: Thank god you were gone! STFU about your flu! Stop complaining about commonplace bullshit and we don't fucking care who you were making out with in the copy room. You're not important. Go away.

Edroso nails Megan

Please go read Roy Edroso's latest post on Megan. Its a real doozy.

We all remember Megan's absolutely genuine furor over Edroso's remark that she was a 'lipstick libertarian', and how Edroso's use of that phrase was indicative of how sexist liberals really are.

Apparently, the meaning has changed. Megan now appears on bloggingheads with Kerry Howley (writer for Reason and possessor of a vagina) under the title: "Lipstick Libertarians."

Either Megan is a lying hypocrite, or she thinks that plurarizing an insult renders it innocuous.

We really need to spend more time with her friends

Megan is boring today, but I managed to run across flabtastic following the link train of another site. Check out this wonderful foray into the world of the English language:

The main problems here would be that nobody uses "surge" that way (indeed, John McCain has a long history of using the term "surge" the same way as everyone else) and also that the short form of counterinsurgency the abbreviation-mad military uses is "COIN." But of course maybe McCain will say that he has a private language in which "surge" means "counterinsurgency" and it's therefore wrong to bother him about this. In which case, I suppose it's hard for anyone to ever prove that he's wrong. But on the other hand if that's what he means, then it's hard to make sense of the claim that McCain was "right about the surge" whereas Obama was "wrong" since if "the surge" is just a generic term for the use of counterinsurgency tactics the I don't think McCain and Obama ever really disagreed.

I can't believe these people get paid to write. I don't notice any typos (though I admit that I can't look at it too carefully or else my eyes start to bleed) so he must've proofread it. How did he not notice that horrible string of horrible transitions and run on sentences slamming into each other from behind like a 100 car pile up after a flash fog over the freeway? Seriously, dude, sentences are supposed to be short and sweet, like that candy bar you're munching on right now. They aren't supposed to be a gigantic pile of lard that present an imposing challenge for us to get through, like your regular meals surely are.

I am at such a loss over these people. They clearly aren't paid for their writing - which is shit. I sincerely hope they aren't paid for their ideas - which are standard shallow tripe. What, in God's fucking name, ARE they being paid for? I understand that The Atlantic was purchased to give a right-wing idiot a respectable name to sit behind, but didn't said idiot realize that hiring a bunch of barely literate monkeys would sink that name faster than a tsunami hitting a swift boat? For fuck's sake, couldn't this dipshit at least put aside some of Fatty Matty's candy allowance for a fucking proofreader?

Maybe he's looking for one. I bet I could fleece the bastard. I'll send in a resume and tell him that, for a mere 50 dollars a blog post, I'll proof everyone in the black hole of talent amd ideas they call "The Voices" section. If he's stupid enough to hire these clowns, he'd probably think that that was a bargain.

UPDATE:

A typo has been brought to my attention in the comments, but I don't give a rats ass. I take time off my paid work to write, my paid work isn't writing.

brad adds:

I ain't paid for this, either, but I fixed a few things. I don't want this place to suffer from internet semi-literacy. Fix your oopsies, co-bloggers. All of yah.

Nutella gets all huffy:

Damn it, I do proof read! So a couple things get past. That just means I'm retarded not a bad writer. Oh, wait....

STOP BLOWING MY MIND ALREADY!

Ah, ever the insightful. What incredible things hath our lady observed today?

Did you know that open mic nights tend to have low quality poetry? I know, it doesn't seem like when you offer a small venue to anyone who wants it that untalented people might partake, but our muse has seen a pattern! Let's hope no one points out to her that the same is true of blogs and that in the electronic case, the really sucky ones even get popular sometimes. Of course, she also admits that she might be somewhat jaded - jaded to the point that she would miss good poetry even if it were shoved down her throat.

In other words, never mind, as usual, her post is just a whack you in the face of waste of time.

Bonus fun:
Her closing paragraph (yes, she penned multiple in her take down of these pernicious coffee house occasions) starts off with these two wonderful sentences:

Which led me to realize that I have never heard good poetry at an open mike night. Which leads me to wonder if it is possible to hear good poetry at an open mike night.

Which left me on the doorstop of the best writing on the internet I've ever seen!

Ah, The Atlantic; the open mic night of political blogging.

And while we're insulting people who are at least trying to be meaningful and take a break from the mundane superficiality that has drenched the entirety of American culture, do you know who else are obnoxious?!?! People who don't own televisions! That's right, because there's nothing more annoying than anyone who dares suggest that there are better things to do than sit in front of the idiot box all day. To be fair, our muse didn't make this scathing criticism of those pesky "intellectuals" all on her own. She is, however, one of the very few to realize how important it is to spread this observation around.

The author she links doesn't have the terrible wit of McTwain, who unleashes this bomb!

Remember, these days, when you say "I don't own a television", you're not just misleading people into believing that you spend all of your spare time reading Proust in the original Sanskrit; you're also signalling that you don't have a Wii. This is a major social liability.

OH, Megan! You're such a card.

Unfortunately, that card is the deuce of shit.

UPDATE: Fixed broken link

Hat Tip

To our partner in obsession, Susan, for this find.

The theme of the party was Republicanism, given the convention for which several of the bloggers were in town. In keeping with the theme, Megan (who bills herself as a “libertarian,” which as someone at the party noted is what Republicans call themselves when they’re embarrassed to admit they’re Republicans) did all the cooking and waited on the mostly male assemblage hand and foot — barefoot, at that — and clad in a ’50s-housewife-style blouse and skirt and lace apron, the table decorated with two lilac blooms and a small American flag, and so on. The meal, along the same lines, consisted of glazed chicken, homemade dinner rolls, potato salad,
homemade peach pies and, the pièce de résistance, jello salad.

She thinks she's making fun of others, but she's making fun of herself. It's brilliant.

Ezra, stupid enough to believe a sound-byte

I don't know why I'm so eager to insult people today, but if I can't insult Megan I'll insult her friends.

So I strolled on over to our favorite ambiguously gay blogger's house and, like the lazy ass that I am, took a gander at a few of his most recent posts

This one caught my eye. He quotes Al Gore saying "Here's the difference, when the demand for wind and solar goes u, costs go down. When demand for oil and gas goes up, prices go up." and gives an enthusiastic "True dat girlfriend!" before ducking his head, checking to ensure that no one saw, and typing a muted "True enough."

You know what's also true? The difference between driving to work and skydiving to work is that when demand for skydiving goes up, prices come down! We should totally invest in skydiving, ASA-FUCKING-P.

You see, dipshits, oil is an entrenched part of our economy and there are not many easy ways left to utilize it more efficiently (and no, fuck nuts, replacing the entire US fleet of cars with slightly more efficient models isn't actually easy), which is why its demand is inelastic and supply is limited.

Renewable energies are a fringe market, not even close to fully implemented that hardly even glimpse the economies of scale that oil does, let alone have seen the hard core research that oil has seen for like the past million fucking years.

If we had a renewables based economy and there was a demand spike, guess what, PRICES FOR ENERGY WOULD STILL GO UP.

I'm all for renewables, but let's try not to muck up the cause with a bunch of "being a fucking moron" along the way, eh?