Back to Not Being Back

I dunno about you guys, but I'm sick of brad sullying this place up with this new character he's created, Megan McArdle. C'mon, how can we possibly believe she exists? A woman who claims expertise in economics with no formal training in it and who can't even use a calculator? A professional writer that doesn't proofread? And she's six-four? ANNNND her name is fucking Megan McArdle? Shit, I've seen more believable characters in a Marvel comic.

No one is buying it, brad.

Let's go on to something more believable. Someone on Facebook says that this is terribly exciting. Sure.

Now, I've become far too fatalistically apathetic to read long articles filled with the gory details of the bombs bought with my money and dropped on foreigner's heads, but I managed to get far enough in this one to read this fine excursion into political philosophy from our soi-dissant intellectual compatriots over at The New Republic:

Nation-building is a painstakingly slow enterprise. At least some Pakistanis are playing a double game. NATO forces continue to kill non-combatants, despite universal acknowledgment that doing so alienates the people whose affections we are desperate to win.

Because if there's one thing years of war have taught us about the middle east it's that everyone would love America if only their bombs were somehow more accurate. Oh, and they have to be "liberal" bombs.

And if any of you fuckers refute my arguments with facts from the rest of the article, or tell me that The New Republic doesn't call itself liberal or some shit, I'm gonna make you listen to more of brad's "Megan McArdle: The Magical Made-Up Mathematicians Meandering Market Based Solution." I hear the next chapter involves a love interest.

Wrong Again

adsogijadsog

Obviously, yes, I was upset yesterday. I'm glad that this could bring so much joy to peoples' hearts, and of course to know that for many people, the happiest part of passing health care reform seems to have been knowing that it made people like me unhappy.

GOD DAMN IT CUNT FACE.

NO

The fact that 32 million people getting access to doctors does not make you happy makes NONE OF US HAPPY.

You are the abyss, Megan, and you kill our souls when you stare back.

UGH.

Wahmbulance

Shorter Meganadsfhgbo;aj

"When congress passes hugely unpopular legislation that I like it's because they're smarter than the public. When it passes unpopular legislation that I don't like it's because democrats are poopyheads."

Yup, in Megan stupid cunty land, she can openly fuck the shit outta TARP but HCR is fucking kryptonite. Banks deserve money. People deserve the backside of the invisible hand and, yeah, I'm not apologizing. That stupid whore is a fucking cuntsicle, with a stick right up her ass, a dry barren wasteland between her legs, a pot o' gold where her heart is, and a swirling vortex betwixt the eyes.

FUCK SHIT PISS PENIS ASS WHORE COCK CRAP FOURLETTERWORDSOUTYERASS.

Why do I keep ending up back at her fucking webblogawful.

typo no formatting you're lucky I put in a link fuck off and die world it's made of god damn rotten fungus toecheese assholes with a knife in my nipples, a crooked back, and only fucking reruns of the drew carey version of... well... anything.

Fuck You, Susan

Seriously, Susan, here I was, happily minding my own business and your damn post pops up on my google reader and I end up clicking through to a link to McArdle. What the fuck were you thinking? What the fuck was I thinking? What the fuck was Megan... oh wait, no.. that doesn't work.

Anyway, so Megan's latest "thought" is about stupid student protestors. They are stupid, it's true. Apparently some of the ones in Berkeley had "Impeach Obama" signs or some shit. I dunno. Stupid happens. I'm trying to just stand in the middle of the vortex and let the morons swirl around me these days. That's why I'm so pissed at Susan for shoving stupid in my eye.

Oh, right, McArdle and the post and blah blah here's a quote:

As someone who was known to attend a protest or two herself during college, I have been struggling mightily to find some sensible arguments in the movement of students protesting budget cuts at their campuses.

I love how Megan always mentions her college protesting days. It serves two purposes. One is the ever important "I used to be a liberal" street cred and another is to condescend in a sort of "yeah, I used to wear diapers but then I learned to shit in the toilet" kind of way.

Anyway, she makes a decent point about protesters sort of ignoring reality. I could be contrarian and make some point about how maybe they're not protesting a lack of revenue as much as a misallocation of resources or, in California's sake, legislative obstinance that has preempted any kind of fiscal relief. I'm not sure that I'm willing to give the student's that much credit though, so we'll agree to disagree.

At any rate, this sort of anger in the face of reality which Megan so blithely mocks is familiar to our lass. She is a libertarian. I'm curious, though, as to why she hasn't said more about the tea parties. Aren't they the opposite side of the same coin? No? Something about incoherent protests, maybe? Have 2x4 jokes gone out of style? OK, nevermind. Sorry to bother you Megan.

Oh, and I'd maybe try and find some links where Megan talks about the tea parties but the Teh Atlantik site revamp has made searching even more annoying than it was before over there (which is fucking amazing! Monster incompetence!), so fuck that, too.

Crap, I coulda sworn there was a funny in there somewhere. It hasn't come to me. Pfft. Whatever. If you want something funny, try this and then this. Or maybe click those links in opposite order. I'm not sure which is funnier. Also, there's this hilarious thing they do on the internet now where they take a picture of a cat and then put a caption on it like it's talking. It's pretty hilarious. Check it out.

PS One of the websites I go to look at naked ladies now has banner ads for explicit animated Na'vi (sp?) porn. That didn't take long.

But What About the Earth's Proton Torpedoes?

Why is there so much hackdom around.

Discovery News, at it's most scientific:

EARTH RAISED MAGNETIC SHIELD EARLIER THAN THOUGHT

Heckuva headline there, Discovery. But questions remain unanswered. Were the shields at full power? Had the Earth "given it all she's got" by then? I guess I'll have to enroll in some adult education classes to find out the answers to that science. Hope The Academy is still taking applications.

If You Can't Beat Them, Call Them Poopyheads

Shorter Ross Douthat:
Six Hours of Hot Air!

My peers have no intellectual capabilities and act like little children. My opponents are jerks for pointing this out and no one should get healthcare because of it.

In the article, he actually says that Obama is "too professional." Yeah, we need more leaders who fly headlong into decisions based on gut reactions. Screw this thinking shit. It has never worked.

Megan's website redo seems to have messed up my Google reader, as I haven't been seeing any of her posts. I'm too lazy to go to her URL, click on the read more button and then actually read her drivel, so, fuck that. This might be the end of me. Go over and read her columns yourself, imagining a smug ass guffawing and calling her stupid periodically, and you'll have an experience similar to what you get when reading me. A quick glance shows she has an article about the killer Shamu, which has got to be amusing. Apparently she's qualified to discuss marine life now. Those MBAs are fucking handy.

Wagers Anyone?

I will bet my left kidney that this is another such is blogging moment:

While looking for information on Deval Patrick's new idea for controlling costs in Massachusetts (more on which later), I came across this opinion piece in the Huffington Post, titled "New York City Sinks If Health Care Reform Fails." I find this a bit surprising, because first of all, New York City already has a third of its residents on Medicaid; and second of all, the city already has all the main features of the proposed insurance plan except the mandate. (bold mine ~ed)

Although, I haven't figured out what I'm going to do with an extra left kidney when I win.

More Plinking

I know that I've just been taking a lot of pot shots lately, but you'll forgive my flagging enthusiasm for sweeping back the ocean. The stupid has always been with us and there's nothing we can do but sit back and smirk, trying hard to forget the misery that our selfish and idiotic tendencies bestow upon the less fortunate.

Anyway, in another post whose end I have no inclination of reaching, Megan starts out strong with the stupid, self-defeating debating tactics of which she's so fond.

Step 1) Decry the rhetoric of your opponents without citing any of them:

For some reason, everyone I've seen who has so far responded to my piece on mortality and the lack of insurance has pulled exactly the same debater's trick: they restate my argument in maximalist form, and then proceed to really kick the hell out of the strawman they've created.

Step 2) Spew a bunch of nonsense and evocative language meant to depict your opponents as absurd, wailing harpies who've lost all reason:

I mean, there's hay and shreds of fabric on the ceiling of offices three floors above them. Button eyes flying off so fast that several have achieved escape velocity. Crows shrieking in terror as far away as Fresno and Marseilles. It's a stunning display of . . . something.

And thus concludes another opening paragraph to another post I won't read.

I suppose you could accuse me of some form of argumentative fallacy here, but that's just something you'd do because you're a fucking asshole.

Tu Quoque!

Tee Vee Eye

This, though published 12 June, was in The NYT's "e-mailed to me Opinion Section" this (I was conscious by 1100ish) a. m. Like everyone else around here, my patience w/ virtually everything of late is as short as something very, very short, & my patience w/ Our Muse is not detectable w/ an electron microscope. But when somerthing is shoved in one's face, well ...

What little I watched seemed as dense as expected from Mlle. I think we all know that, in the mind of McArdle, the most important aspect of any health care reform is that non-working parasites (investors) must not be kept from making a profit on the pain & suffering of others. And there's something to that effect here.

If you can watch the whole thing, you're a better (or at least stronger-stomached) person than I am. Which isn't saying much.

Round and Round

Today we learn again that "The Rich Really Are[sic] Different" (Ooooh, so close with the capitalization, there.)

A quick search of The Atlantic "Voices" section reveals we've learned this 38 times from the various voices in The Atlantic's head. At least five of those voices are Megan McArdle's, but I'll be fucked if I'm going to do a full count.

I still can't figure out whether she is so stupid she forgets how often she says the same thing over and over, or if she really thinks that using common phrases most writers abandon is clever. I mean, I just glancingly look at her life in disgust and I catch this shit. She's fucking living it! Well, now that I think about it, living the life of Megan McArdle must be horrible enough to make anyone distracted.

BONUS FUN:Two hits back on the search is McArdle's post on Heath Ledger. Ah, the halcyon days of when she was callous about a man's life and death in one fell swoop while being completely ignorant of his consequence. Oh, wait, those days are still here! Fun times!

PS Don't click those last three links. Seriously, don't.