Thursday, July 30, 2009

A Title

Megan has a post up titled "Thining Thin" which is either the world's worst joke or the world's funniest typo. I'm going with the latter, but she's proven to be capable of both so...

Anyway, it starts off with something borrowed from Socrates (or I guess Plato). Socrates when he was drunk and/or on acid:

A typical dialogue on diet goes something like this:
Expert: We don't have any known way to make obese people thin except gastric bypass surgery, which has a 2% mortality rate by itself.

Thin person: But I am very thin!
Which is as WTF as I've seen Megan write. I'm not sure who thinks the only way to lose weight is to shrink your stomach, and why that person is telling some random thin person in a way that makes said person believe they are prescribing it to them. I think Megan is trying to make her "opponents" appear stupider than she is here. It's no wonder why the writing verges on meaningless grunting sounds. It's hard to be that dumb and stay coherent. Next, she hypotheticals:
Expert: We don't have any known way to make short people tall, except for extreme surgeries and hormone injections.

Megan: But I am 6'2"
Which is where the reader is supposed to wonder why she left the part out about falling down the rabbit hole or going through the looking glass because, seriously, WTF is she talking about. Next, we get to explore. Fun!
1. Obesity is increasing in the population, so it can't be genetic.

Well, average height is also increasing in the population. Does that mean that you could be as tall as me, if you weren't too lazy to grow?
Well, except, height increasED and is not increasING. See, back earlier in the century there was a sudden improvement in our diet and so you get this (yes, it's kind of a funny graph but it was the only one I could find quickly):A graph that, surprisingly, shows that Megan took a really fucking stupid analogy and made it that much dumber by being completely fucking wrong. I must say, she takes idiocy to new levels.

For some reason she keeps blathering about height and health, though it serves no purpose other than to show that she's easily distracted. Skipping over that:
Actually, this is rubbish: we don't know how to lose weight. Some of the things Paul Campos is saying about obesity are controversial, but this isn't. Every single study which has attempted to make overweight people get thin without very risky surgery has failed completely and utterly. Fewer than 1% of patients ever keep the weight off.
This is so obviously bullshit I can't believe it. I know anecdotes are usually worthless, but who doesn't know several people that have lost significant weight permanently? At 1%, you'd have to know hundreds of overweight people that have dieted and failed in order to know a handful of successes. That's fucking bullshit. I can think of three people off the top of my head that lost weight and kept it off from the Atkins diet alone. I know several more that have lost weight by other means. I also know at least a few people that went from thin to fat from eating junk food all day long (not saying that's the only reason to get fat, but there are plenty of people for whom that is the cause). So either I know thousands of fucking obese people, or she's full of shit.
Highly educated people who have managed to get their body weight down 5-10% from where their body naturally wants to be confuse what they are doing with what someone obese enough to cause significant medical problems would need to do, which is get their weight down 50% or more from where their body apparently wants it. They are not the same thing. The amount of weight loss that these sanctimonious slenderizers have achieved has no statistically significant health benefits. Let me repeat: losing twenty pounds will not make you healthier. If you have diabetes and high blood pressure, there is an extremely modest improvement in test results. Unfortunately, it's even harder for diabetics to lose weight than the rest of us.
I think the first part of that paragraph is actually a kind of ink blot test; essentially meaningless and meant only to gauge the psyche of the reader from what he infers. The last bit make perfect sense, in the sense that, yes, plugging the holes in the Titanic wouldn't do much at this point. No mention of how missing the iceberg altogether would've gone, though.
Fat tissue makes people want to eat--it sends out for takeout. And hunger is a signal on par with thirst or pain. You can ignore it, if you have sufficient willpower. But just as most people can't withstand torture (a minority can), most people can't ignore the constant demand from their body for food.
Wait, if being fat makes you hungry, why is it impossible to stay thin once you lose weight? Oh, right, cause she's retarded. Also, comparing eating healthy and exercising to torture.... wow. Awesome.

And you know what... it fucking goes on. For like EVER. Forget it. I thought I had the energy to do this but I don't. She is higher and for longer than ever previously recorded due to this fucking marriage thing (maybe one is on the way and so she's more keen on not getting fired.). I broke my fucking back on Saturday. I don't need to do this shit. I wish she could be pithy and stupid instead of long winded and stupid. It's too much work when her posts get so fat.

Fuck her.


bulbul said...

Fat tissue makes people want to eat
Now had this been written by someone else, I would have thought it to be a metaphor meaning "People who are fat need more energy to carry all that fat around which is why they eat more, see also cycle, vicious." But this being Megan, I am pretty sure she meant it literally - actual lipids (like, say, those from that Doctor Who episode) constantly whisper to you "Go, eat, you must eat".
Ceterum autem censeo Meganem esse futuendam.

Dhalgren said...

Let me repeat: losing twenty pounds will not make you healthier.

Hmm....immediate decrease of blood pressure, less weight on joints, better sleep, less chance of a stroke.

Yeah....that's BS. Megan's right! She did her research!!!!!111!!!

bulbul said...

Well yes, Dhalgren, but you see, those things have nothing to do with health per se, because "If you have diabetes and high blood pressure, there is an extremely modest improvement in test results." Show me the test results!!!1!1!!
Ceterum autem censeo Meganem esse futuendam.

Dhalgren said...

Fat tissue makes people want to eat.

Yes, she totally meant it literally. One of her central arguments, documented by this blog, is that she argues that most people who need to lose weight are unable to lose weight (even if they consciously tried).

And then she takes a swipe at borderline overweight people (myself included) who successfully lost weight, telling them that while they are the lucky few who accomplished something, they didn't really make themselves any healthier.

I sense a lot of envy. I know what it's like being a tall Irish-American adult. We're not among 'the beautiful people' we see in high fashion magazines.