Sunday, January 18, 2009

The Intelligence Age Gap

Oh, Megan, you're so old and wise. Why, we need only look at your latest insightful piece about what it was like back in your day. From "The capitalist age gap", in response to Matty-Y saying the post office actually does a good job of hand delivering letters door to door for 40 cents:

I suspect that the real problem here is that Matt does not remember what the Post Office was like before FedEx and email--before, in short, the salutary effects of capitalist competition had made it clear that the organization had better shape up if anyone who worked for it wanted to continue enjoying their dizzyingly boring, but steady and lavishly benefitted, jobs. Or what the phone company was like before there were cell phones and long distance competition.
Megan, you're 34 32 47 36. Matt is 27. Matt remembers when there wasn't email. Matt remembers the time before cell phones. FedEx was founded in 1998. UPS has been around since 1907. Email wasn't commonplace until about the turn of the century. WHAT IN GOD'S FUCKING HELL ARE YOU FUCKING TALKING ABOUT YOU FUCKING DIMWIT?

Beyond that, what the fuck does FedEx have to do with anything? Last I checked, zero fucking people put letters in envelopes and have them sent FedEx. Matt was talking about fucking letter service, not packages. His point was that the postal service has been cheaply and reliably picking up and delivering letters door to door for-fucking-ever. That is just TRUE. Fucking TRUE. All the fucking pro-business masturbating about how it was only FedEx's competition that made USPS able to deliver letters is bullshit. And the idea that email, by providing competition, actually improved the post office? Are you retarded? Postage has skyrocketed since email became wide spread because people are sending FAR fewer letters. I know I'm just a lowly 26 year old, but even I remember when a stamp cost a fucking quarter. This of course, has nothing to do with any competence/incompetence on the part of the post office but is just a natural result of technological advancement.

And the phone company... THE FUCKING PHONE COMPANY??!!?!? Yeah, right, cause the entire communications industry is just a streamlined orgasm of reliable products and friendly costumer service. I constantly hear my friends gushing about how wonderful it is to be anally raped by their choice of, what maybe six different cell providers. Some of the nicer cell companies even use LUBE these days for only 80 MILLION DOLLARS A MONTH (plus tax)! WOOO-HOOO! Why, I had a friend whose phone actually went four whole days without breaking one time. He was so thrilled with the wonderful life that capitalism had brought him that he sent Verizon and extra 50 dollars and an offer for a blow-job any time they want, just for being so extra fucking special.

For fuck's sake, the woman, you complain endlessly about every minor inconvenience in your world, and now you're trying to argue that things were even worse 15 years ago? God, you bitch about trivial shit all the fucking time now. I'd hate to think about what spending time with you 15 years ago was like.


M. Bouffant said...

As a former FedExKinkos wage-slave, I should point out that while FedEx incorporated as FedEx Corp. in 1998, they started flying (as Federal Express) in 1973. The same yr. that other great American Institution, Ms. McArdle, was launched.

bulbul said...

Fuck, is Megan stupid.
Fuck, do I feel old.

Also, I notice that her commenters picked up on "lavishly benefitted jobs." I gather that means healthcare, two weeks of paid vacation and pension. Lavish is not the first adjective I'd have in mind. But then again, I am not a paid Atlantic blogger. Hey, and now I feel better!

Anonymous said...

Fed Ex does have letter service. Documents that are originals or expensive to be replace that need to be tracked and accounted for once they've been delivered are sent that way, but it's not cheap, so nobody does it unless they have to. Still, I hardly think that any courier company in the world - and there are dozens besides Fed Ex - put the postal service at risk. How does Megan's theory that capitalism and privatization trump a government-managed postal system account for the fact that DHL's domestic service basically just folded?