Friday, February 22, 2008

So many goddamn words

dear frigging god, Megan had more to say during the debate than the candidates did.
Some lowlights

8:08 Hillary is looking chipper and trim; she's clearly one of those people who thrives on soul-crushing defeat. Her speech, however, sets my teeth on edge. ...

8:17 Obama comes out with bold, transgressive statment [sic]: not so much liberty in Cuba

8:18 All right, Obama is suggesting ending the travel ban. Not quite bold and transgressive, but refreshingly sensible.
Omigod, he's gonna pick his nos... nope, just a scratch.
8:21 Vader in a pantsuit: this is how one of my debateblogging companions just described Hillary's look. Yes, it's not fair that she gets her clothes commented on and the guys don't. So might I point out that Obama is...
No, you may not.
8:30 Hillary also apparently wants to end the Republican war on science. I say a winner never quits and a quitter never wins. What we need is not an end to the war, but an Iraq style surge.
Megan, hire a writer.
No, seriously. The Canadian hordes with their ice guns and their exaggerated "oo" sounds will not violate the territoriality of this great nation on Hillary Clinton's watch. 54°40' or fight!

Anyone who might have thought that Hillary Clinton had, like, voted for the fence was mistaken. She was voting for possibly considering the fence.
Like, seriously. You guys? You guys! F'real.
9:10 Why is the food talking? This is how one of my companions describes the way Hillary is looking at Obama when he talks.
Megan McArdle was compensated by The Atlantic for those words.
9:17 Hillary seems to be blaming George Bush for Kosovar independence and the resulting riots. Am fascinated to ponder what she might have done to stop the Kosovars from voting to separate . . .
I'm no big Clinton supporter, but I'm willing to guess Hillary knows 150,000 times more about this issue than Megan. Partially because Hillary is a very intelligent woman whose husband had extensive involvements in the area not so long ago, partially because Megan is a dumb ass who mistakes her rectum for a magic entryway to absolute truth.
9:24 Hillary says that she will start withdrawing troops within 60 days. One of the journalists in the room looks puzzled "Can you move a brigade in a month?" Another journalist suggests a follow-up question: "How many troops in a brigade?"
.... it just goes on and on, but I couldn't leave that one out. Now, the grand finale, tho we'll continue on with her afterparty posts.
9:35 Someone in the room says the two candidates look suspiciously healthy. Where are the husky voices and haggard brows? Could it be . . . steroids? And if so, should whoever wins get an asterisk after their name on the presidential roster?

9:37 Another IM from Dan Drezner: Tax cuts = wasteful speding????!!!!

Well . . . have you seen the crap some people buy?

9:42 Dan again: I swear to God, did she just plagiarize Primary Colors???!!!!

9:43 Is she gonna cry? Is she?

9:44 No.
Ralph Waldo Emerson is proud.
Now, some quick shorters.

Hail, Hillary:
The emerging consensus: this was a good debate for Hillary Clinton . . . but not good enough. ...
Obviously, I'm not a Hillary supporter. But now I have that feeling of sympathy that often wells up when an opponent is defeated; once we can afford to be generous once they are no longer much of a threat. And one can hang one's hat on the fact that she was possibly undone simply by bad timing. Not having been much of a primary hound the last time around, I've been repeatedly struck by how path dependent this all seems to be. If the primaries had been run in a different order, mightn't she have emerged as the front runner . . . and wouldn't that be a pretty bitter thought for any of us to live with?
A bitter thought? Thoughts don't has flava, according to reality. Also, much as I loathe the DLC, I could live with Hillary as president. After the last 7 years, she'd be filet fookin mignon.

Great minds think alike:
Chris Beam of Slate had much the same thought as my crew:
Obama looks like a Roman senator. Hillary looks like a guest star in Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Update 8:35 p.m.: A friend corrects me. More like Chronicles of Riddick.
Considering the extremely limited extent of Megan's pop culture references, I can only respond to this by saying, "Worst. Scifi references. Ever."(Omigozors, I think I just plagiarized her joke. Halp!)

Who you calling a plagiarist?:
During the debate, Dan Drezner suggested to me over IM that Hillary Clinton was plagiarizing Primary Colors. He backs it up on his own blog:
Hillary Clinton, February 21, 2008 debate with Barack Obama: "You know, lifting whole passages from someone else's speeches is not change you can believe in, it's change you can Xerox." Hillary Clinton, later on in the same debate: "You know, the hits I've taken in life are nothing compared to what goes on every single day in the lives of people across our country." Jack Stanton speech, in Primary Colors (New York: Random House, 1996), p. 162: "Y'know, I've taken some hits in this campaign. It hasn't been easy for me, or my family. It hasn't been fair, but it hasn't been anything compared to the hits a lot of you take every day."
Meanwhile, Chris Beam at Slate picks up on another instance:

Hillary, however, pivots in a way that evokes, of all things, her Diner Sob. Only this time, she sets herself up: “People often ask me, ‘How do you do it? How do you keep going?’ ” That’s the exact same question asked by Marianne Pernold Young at the CafĂ© Espresso in Portsmouth, New Hampshire on the eve of the primary. Clinton then goes into a colorful anecdote about a medical center filled with people injured in Iraq. She doesn’t exactly tear up, but it’s a deliberately emotional moment. (We see Chelsea looking teary afterwards.) At the very end, she borrows a line that John Edwards used toward the end of his campaign. "We're going to be fine," she said, referring to herself and Obama. (Edwards always said it about himself and Elizabeth.) "I just hope we can say the same thing about the American people."
The natural responses to these "accusations" are obvious, I don't even need to voice them. I'd just like to note that Megan is a coward, and didn't even add a "heh, indeed" to the post. She's merely calling attention to what others are saying, not saying it herself. (Still, don't tell Hillary where you heard it, k?)

I hope Megan takes a long weekend. She's been in horrid form this week.


spencer said...

What we need is not an end to the war, but an Iraq style surge.

Okay, so she's either serious about this or she's joking. If she's serious about it, that's bad for obvious reasons (i.e., the Republican War on Science promotes superstitious ignorance at the expense of national competitiveness). If she's actually joking about it, it proves she's about as funny as Bruno Kirby's character in Good Morning Vietnam.

Anonymous said...

Plagiarizing Primary Colors? You can't plagiarize political rhetoric. That's like trying to sue a candidate for kissing a baby. These people find themselves too clever.

M. Bouffant said...

St. Nick on a stick, she's "liveblogging" & letting the other drunks in the room do her "work" for her?

Anonymous said...

Ha ha, hilarious, I just wandered over here from instaputz.

I am upset, however, that you did not include Firing Bill Walton in your polling choices.

I say that AND I'm a Blazers fan!